It's a funny thing, memory. It may or may not represent a balanced account of what actually happened. We may deceive ourselves with selective editing. So folk can have differing memories of the same events. That can be true for both individuals and whole communities. (Northern Ireland has at least 2 different histories depending on who you listen to/read. It's hardly alone in that respect. However, there are serious efforts afoot to address that here, and provide hope for a shared future).
In the last book I reviewed here, the main character lost his memory and had to relearn a great deal about himself and what had gone before. It gave him the potential to escape his past. In this one, the central character is plagued by memories she can't forget. They continually invade the present, in great detail, dragging her back to the past. Yet, in her work as a Private Investigator, Brenna Spector's hyperthymesia does have some benefits.
Since I've enjoyed Harlan Coben novels, and am a big Lee Child fan, I was hardly going to pass up a book which carries strong recommendations by these writers on its front and rear cover.
The plot involves the disappearance of a young girl, but for a quite a while it's not clear to whom the title actually is referring. There are multiple candidates for "and she was" - Iris, Lydia, Carol, and Brenna's sister Clea.
Whilst Brenna's memories regularly interrupt her thought processes, several other people are doing their best to forget the past. The police investigation into the missing girl floundered long ago, but Brenna's steely determination starts to uncover secrets and lies. And then there are anonymous phone calls from a little girl saying she's "so sorry." Investigations by Brenna and others provoke an angry, violent response to be unleashed.
Cue a Blue Oyster Cult song on such anger - some might say anger of Biblical proportions.
"You scorned the love that I gave you
You lied now nothing can save you
Blue skies are turning to grey
I know the games that you play
Winds of rage they start to build
Too much madness will lay you under
The cards you draw don't help at all
Hear the sound of approaching thunder
When you see the clouds blacken
Remember you've been warned
No shelter from my fierce winds
Because, I am the storm
You'll hear my echoes of anger
You'll fear the roar of my thunder ..."
Will justice be delivered? If so, what will it look like?
There is, of course, a much more obvious song applicable to the book, which struck me from the moment I saw the title. It actually gets referenced in the book (p274) in a memory of Brenna's from 1985. Brenna ponders whether the song is about an acid trip, or a girl vanishing.
Some have said it's about astral projection or "out-of-body experience." David Byrne has said live that it was about a girl he knew at High School in Baltimore who 'did' LSD in a field near the Yoohoo drink factory. I've discovered some research here which suggests that's at least feasible geographically.
One reason I like the song is that the recurring "And she was" is often tautologous - a bit like the Northern Irish phrase "so it is." [It's kinda Norn Irish for 'verily I say unto you' - tho' it may not necessarily be all that verily :-)]
So, there you have it - 2 novels I recommend (so I do) which explore is/am/was in fiction. Given that we know now from physics that there is no such thing as a universal "now," maybe the blurring of distinction between past, present and future isn't just fictional...
"People like us, who believe in physics, know that the distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion." Einstein.
"I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now." (Guess who...)
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